Odds and ends

Three thoughts on this the day before I receive my Master's degree

Identity (yes, identity again)

Identity hasn't simply been the theme of this past semester (see last entry), it has been the theme of my entire time here at North Park. Four years ago my very first class of my Master's program was New Testament I, taught by Klyne Snodgrass. Anyone who has taken this course knows that the central theme of the course is identity. The class asks who we are, who Christ is, and who we are in light of who Christ is.

My very short answer to the last question is that I am a pastor. As such, I am called to bring Jesus to others, to extend to them the grace that has been extended to me.

Last Monday, my very last class of my Master's program was a worship service. During the service Communion was served. Each student received the elements, and then in turn gave the elements to another student.

My time at North Park began by asking the question of who I am. My time at North Park ended by answering that question with serving the bread and extending to another the grace that had been extended to me.

Holding On
Doesn't it feel good to be done?
This question has been asked of me several times in the last week.

The simple answer is yes. Yes it feels good to be done. It feels good to have all the papers and tests and books and academic requirements of this season put to rest.

The less simple answer is no. It is scary to know that it is time to move from the place where I have lived and worked over the last four years. It is scary to know that it is time to leave behind the people with whom I have laughed and cried over the last four years. It is scary to know that it is time to move beyond what I know.

In the comic book Fables (which I cannot recomend enough) there is a character called the Magic Mirror (yep, that Magic Mirror). The Mirror was once human, but has been trapped for uncounted millennia. In the comic there is an event called the Unbinding. The short version is that what was magically bound together has now come apart. The mirror himself almost came free of his glass prison.

Fables #87

He goes onto explain that at the last minute he found himself holding to place he had come to know. So now he remains in the mirror. Like the Mirror, I find myself wishing to hold onto the place I know.

I am so grateful that the Great Unbinding known as Graduation is upon me. I am so grateful for all who stood by me. I am grateful for the moments filled with laughter and those filled with tears. I am grateful for the preparation I have received. I am grateful for having been given the perspective and tools to better extend to others the grace extended to me.

Am I happy to be done? Yes.

And no.

And Yet...

Shelves

This morning as I set my Bible on the coffee table, I looked up at my bookshelf. My bookshelf contains my DVDs and comic books (mostly Fables). They are the stories I can go to after a long day.

They are the stories that help me escape. My shelf is filled with the things make me feel safe. Soon they will be packed away and possibly stored away for some time as I look for what is next for me.

This thought made me sad. I grieve the fact that my comfort and security will radically change in the coming months. However, as I thought about packing, moving, changing, I was reminded that as much as it is a comfort to have my things around me, I would rather have God beside me.
 
--Serving Him alongside all of you, just from further away
--Jesse Letourneau